This is not an article about hosting options I can never afford but will constantly obsess about until the end of time (because that's how I roll). Instead, this is an article about how MediaTemple > Dreamhost with its new design, and how this affects sea turtles (still rolling, hmm?).

The Dreamhost website is effectively dying. It has undergone some sort of strange decline, like the creep of cancer — half the venom, but twice as depressing. Their navigation sets me off right away. Everything else oozes curves but suddenly, there's that long blue bar, devoid of gradients, interrupting my happy page perusing. It just doesn't fit, not with Dreamhost's niche in on the INTARWEBZ. Look up a little bit from that, and you see a strange contact button with a yellow triangle, completely out of place. It's not entirely bad; pages like the TOS are well organized AFTER the immediate onset of the cancerous navigation. Maybe they'll fix that up soon and spare me the agony. Or fire the guy who came up with their crappy navigation.

On the other hand, I'm absolutely thrilled over the new MediaTemple website. Not only have they delved into using background images instead of image navigation, like they used to, but they made it so classy. I'm in awe and I feel retarded for saying that because it's only the website, right? It doesn't change anything at all...

The dying days of professionalism

Animated GIFs used to be extremely big on the Internet, right up there with pages of jokes and marquees to dissuade the viewer from the idea that, "My god, this really isn't the new millennium, but it feels like it!". Welcome to 1996. Enjoy your stay. This basically explains why the attitude of "Everyone else is doing it!" is still around; because at one time, it was popular, and you know, you have to stick with the big guys. Dreamhost, at least, doesn't suffer from a lack of uniqueness ala the ubiquitous "professional" flash layout, which I'm sad to say pervaded Trap17 pretty easily. Instead, Dreamhost mangles the concept of "ease" with this redesign. Even the once fantastic knowledge base/glossary is a little rough.

What MediaTemple excels at in this picture is simplifying the process. You don't have to look all over the page for information. You can easily find what you want and get on with your day, unless you're me and your day consists of bumming around the computer, and that's that.

A lot of hosts miss this idea: users want to see their options and not get caught in a web of additional content and graphics. Instead of this giant mangled chart of death, MediaTemple brings us a well organized grid of options. Who has the patience to read everything on Dreamhost's page? Regardless of their other successes, Dreamhost has to realize that design does matter. It's advertisement. You can't get away with everything; MediaTemple on the other hand knows the Internet is one giant billboard, and right now, they're the ones with the shiny new paint and Dreamhost is withering away in the rust. Bygones are steadily returning to being bygones yet again.

Where are my goddamn sea turtles?

Ah, yes. The nature enthusiast and quasi—anarchist. Here you are, courtesy of some crazy politician named Dan Rutherford. HE'S SO CRAZY.